Rachel Wonderland Lists “16 Things I Would Want If I Got Dementia”


16 Things I Would Want If I Got Dementia is a list I wrote in December 2014 that picked up a lot of traction on the Internet. The post was originally publicized on Alzheimer’s Reading Room. Want to re-post? Scroll down for information.

RACHEL WONDERLAND. Retrieved 3/10/16: http://www.dementia-by-day.com/16things

If I Get Dementia
  1. If I get dementia, I want my friends and family to embrace my reality. If I think my spouse is still alive, or if I think we’re visiting my parents for dinner, let me believe those things. I’ll be much happier for it.
  2. If I get dementia, I don’t want to be treated like a child. Talk to me like the adult that I am.
  3.  If I get dementia, I still want to enjoy the things that I’ve always enjoyed. Help me find a way to exercise, read, and visit with friends.
  4.  If I get dementia, ask me to tell you a story from my past.
  5.  If I get dementia, and I become agitated, take the time to figure out what is bothering me.
  6.  If I get dementia, treat me the way that you would want to be treated.
  7.  If I get dementia, make sure that there are plenty of snacks for me in the house. Even now if I don’t eat I get angry, and if I have dementia, I may have trouble explaining what I need.
  8.  If I get dementia, don’t talk about me as if I’m not in the room.
  9.  If I get dementia, don’t feel guilty if you cannot care for me 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It’s not your fault, and you’ve done your best. Find someone who can help you, or choose a great new place for me to live.
  10.  If I get dementia, and I live in a dementia care community, please visit me often.
  11.  If I get dementia, don’t act frustrated if I mix up names, events, or places. Take a deep breath. It’s not my fault.
  12.  If I get dementia, make sure I always have my favorite music playing within earshot.
  13.  If I get dementia, and I like to pick up items and carry them around, help me return those items to their original places.
  14.  If I get dementia, don’t exclude me from parties and family gatherings.
  15.  If I get dementia, know that I still like receiving hugs or handshakes.
  16.  If I get dementia, remember that I am still the person you know and love.

Want to re-post this list? Rachel says:

This list is available on other websites, but the copyright does belong to me and to Alzheimer’s Reading Room. You are welcome to re-post it, but you MUST include a link to my website and my name, and also a note that it was originally published for Alzheimer’s Reading Room. You are NOT allowed to create a print of the poster and try to sell it.

RACHEL WONDERLAND. Retrieved 3/10/16: http://www.dementia-by-day.com/16things